i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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