You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
