There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
