He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
