Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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