He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
