walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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