I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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