Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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