This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
