I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
