I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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