At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
