I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
