he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
