Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
