That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
