dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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