so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
