I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
