In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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