I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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