She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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