Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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