I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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