She's JV to your varsity
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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