i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
