and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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