Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
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