I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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