Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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