its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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