I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize