So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
