That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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