Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
