bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
