My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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