Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
it wasn't lemon gatorade
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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