At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
