mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Fuck appropriateness.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
