there was a trapeze. enough said
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
