super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
