just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
