are you so shy because you have an std?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
