I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Randomize