He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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