I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Acid is not a monday night drug
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
