How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
