Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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