For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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