it wasn't lemon gatorade
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
